If it’s closed, open it. If it’s open, close it. If it’s wet, dry it. If it’s dry, wet it. And in every case use cortisone.
And I’ve been told that in the orchestral and opera world it’s violists and tenors who don’t get no respect, but then it was a baritone who told me that.
Interestingly, the drummer jokes also involve pizza, as in:
What’s the difference between a drummer and a pizza?
A pizza can feed a family of four.
How do you make a drummer’s car go faster?
Take the pizza sign off the top.
How do you get a drummer off your porch?
However, according to Robby, there’s something even worse than being a drummer, and that’s a folkie, something I never aspired to be.
How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One to screw it in and six to sing about how great the old one was.
What’s a folksinger without a girl friend?
What happens when a folk singer wins the lottery?
He gets to play a lot more gigs.
But even the folk world has its hierarchy, with banjo players at the bottom:
What’s perfect pitch?
Being able to throw a banjo ten feet into the garbage can.
What happens when a banjo player leaves his car in a bad neighborhood?
He comes back and it’s filled with banjoes.
And back to rock musicians, there’s this one; no doubt the drummers getting back:
How many lead singers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One to put it in and wait for the world to revolve around him.
I only dimly remember once hearing a joke about an artist, having something to do with real estate and outhouses. Curious, I looked up “artist jokes” on the Web, and found a bunch but they weren’t very funny. Except for this one:
How many performance artists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
I don’t know. I left.